I’m in a writing mood but I honestly really don’t know what to write about. Weird huh? What can I possibly talk about that I haven’t talked about already? I guess this is what they call writers block. As the chambers of my mind begin to shift around I feel like taking a trip down that ever so elusive rabbit hole. The rabbit hole of my mind that leads to the brightest and darkest of places. A towering abyss of emotion, fear, and terror. We will now take a journey through the worm hole. Are you nervous, you better be cause shit may get a little crazy but what do I define as crazy if the world already considers me to be a bit crazy? Is my definition of crazy some bizarre place that will give you terrifying nightmares or is my definition of crazy the complete opposite? Maybe your definition of normal is my definition of crazy, I don’t know but this is the kind of mind fuckery that make me messing with your head a lot funnier. But how can a guy with Autism have a sense of humor? Does he even know what humor is? Does he even know how to what a joke is or sarcasm for that matter?
Confused yet? Sounds like you already are, you feel like you woke up in the middle of the Shibuya Crossing with a stamped of people walking around your and all of a sudden you feel as if you’re drowning in the madness. Faster and faster you go, plunging deeper and deeper into the abyss. You’re falling but you don’t know where. You’ve been falling for hours yet it feels like you’re suspended in eternity. You don’t like this creeping feeling and you sure as hell don’t like the anticipation, you don’t know where you’ll end up and you don’t know when you’ll stop falling. Soon you feel like you might approach the ground, you feel as if this will be all over and that you’ll wake from this crazy nightmare. As soon as you hit the ground you wake up but the sky pulls you through the roof and all of a sudden you’re falling up, if there’s such a thing.
Flying higher and higher and higher, you can see the sky, your dreams, and your ambitions but as you get closer they further they get and all of a sudden the universe is teasing you, playing games with your head and your heart, kind of like what I’m doing to you. Well shit, it appears I’ve broken the fourth wall. I literally punched the fourth wall in the face and shattered it into pieces and not I’m in your dreams, your nightmares. You can’t escape, you’re trapped in this corridor of darkness and no one will ever reach you. Soon you realize that I’m what nightmares are made of. Anxiety spikes tenfold and soon turbulence becomes your only mind state. I take a shit on your dreams and flush you along with your the ruined remains. You plunge deeper and deeper into the darkness. You realize that falling is your destiny and that your life’s goal is to always plunge deeper and deeper into the abyss because as scary as the abyss is, you know that falling brings you closer to the truth so you’re willing to fall for how ever long it takes to get that moment of clarity, that reprieve that you’ve dreamed of for years. You dream of the day you’ll finally get it, the day when it’ll finally all make sense and only when everything makes sense can you truly live.
What in the hell did he just make us read you ask? My mind running wild. I was bored but I didn’t have anything useful to write but I wanted to write so I decided to let my mind run wild. Pretty trippy huh? What does this complex train of thought have to do with my life? I don’t know, I’ll leave that up for you to decide. Maybe it has everything to do with my life, maybe it doesn’t. That’s the beauty of the universe, every answer is correct in the situation so I’ll let you decide what the this all means. Stay classy peole.