Friendship Is Magic (Important Life Lessons From a Kid’s Cartoon)

Posted on January 28, 2014 by flem0328

I have a confession to make which will tie into this blog post. It would appear this weekend I have gotten into a show that well, wasn’t really meant to be watched and enjoyed by adult men in this first place but somehow it has ushered quite the following from the 18-35 male demographic. Now if you are a “Brony” or know what one is or you’re familiar with the fandom then you’ve recognized the blog title and already know exactly what show I am now officially hooked on. For those who don’t know what a “Brony” is then allow me to explain. “Bronies” are males from ages 18-35 (sometimes older and sometimes younger) who are avid fans of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. That’s right, I have gotten hooked to My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and before you start looking at me funny or calling me gay or think that I’m some weird sick and twisted individual for watching a show that is aimed at little girls I need to explain to you why the fuss and why the show is so critically acclaimed way outside of its demographic and why I have fallen in love with the show. Continue reading →

Those Moments Where I Remember “Oh That’s Right, I’m Autistic”

Posted on January 24, 2014 by flem0328

90% of the time I like to believe that I’m just like everyone else, that I can blend into society and no one would ever notice that there was something off with me. I try as hard as I humanly possibly can to convince myself that I am no different than your average person. This mentality works often works those “moments” happen where I’m reminded that I have Autism and that there’s not much I can do about it. These “moments” usually refer to the way I respond to certain situations that we’re all presented with. The most common situation is change but it doesn’t have to be all types of change, it has to be change that can trigger anxiety or change that isn’t for the better, change that complicates or change that affects my ability to enjoy something how I used to. It can also be change where the results will be unknown for quite some time.

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Keep On Truckin’ (One Nation, Underdog…)

Posted on January 20, 2014 by flem0328

So yesterday I had to watch my football team, the New England Patriots get their asses mercilessly handed to them by none other than the Denver Broncos, a team we barely beat in overtime a few games ago thanks to one of the best comebacks in the history of our franchise. Yesterday we played the Broncos again for the AFC Championship and the right to go to the Superbowl. We fell and we fell hard to a Broncos team that fought like true champions. Any loss of that magnitude hurts but it hurts even more given what the team had to endure prior to and during this season. We loss Wes Welker to the none other than the Broncos due to our team’s inability to but fourth a competitive salary. We loss Aaron Hernandez to, well the entire country already knows how much of an idiot Hernandez is so I’m not even doing to share my two cents on that one. Rob Gronkowski, our star tight end and probably the best NFL receiver in recent memory due to his giant hands, his height, and unbelievable speed was rehabbing injuries from the previous season and wouldn’t be cleared to play until several weeks into the season. With the loss of a very dominant receiver core and the introduction of many rookie players, every sports commentator in existence spelled doom and gloom for our team. No one thought we had a chance at the playoffs this year and everyone wrote us off before we even had a chance to prove ourselves. In those first five games we played during the season, it was obvious our offense was hurting. We barely won games and the lack of a good offense ended up tasking our defensive line greatly which resulted in a nasty ripple effect in the form of losses critical losses to our D Line (Vince Wilfork and Tommy Kelly). Even with a good amount of wins and a lead in our division things were looking grim. Our rookies were sloppy and teams were easily destroying our defensive line. Yet somehow our team always managed to pull through despite the shitty hand they were dealt. Our team had a reliance I had yet see until now. Continue reading →

The Little Machine That Could (Autism, Robots, and Artificial Intelligence)

Posted on January 3, 2014 by flem0328

Okay show of hands, who has watched “The Terminator Trilogy”, ‘The Matrix Trilogy”, I-Robot”, “The 13th Floor”, and “Tron”? If you have then you may have an idea of where this post is going but of course with me, you never know where ANY post is going until it gets there. Anyways, for those who haven’t seen these movies then you don’t necessarily need to know the plots, you need only to know the central theme that drives these plots. It is them concept of artificial intelligence and how a machine taught solely to follow instructions and routines can become self aware and eventually make their own decisions, their decisions usually cataclysmic. Each movie focuses on the protagonist(s) attempting to stop a rogue artificial intelligence from enslaving the entire human race. These movies shed light on a concept computer programmers had been toying with long before Hollywood existed. Now you’re probably wondering once again what this madness has to do with Autism, allow me to elaborate in a way that will blow your mind harder than snorting 15 lines of cocaine (Disclaimer: I don’t do drugs, they’re simply twisted analogies). Before we can get into the meat of this blog post, I have to tell a little tale that will tie into this blog post. Continue reading →

Mister Spock, Autism, and How My Logic Ruined the Magic of Christmas

Posted on December 21, 2013 by flem0328

Now before I go on with this blog post I need to put up a rather big disclaimer. I do not think Spock is on the spectrum and nor will this blog post be used to try to prove that. Also, please forgive me for any inaccuracies in my part of trying to describe Spock and the Star Trek universe, I rarely watched the series and these observations are based more on the recent movies. I do however believe there are some uncanny similarities between his logic driven through process and the thought process of someone on the spectrum. Now die hard Star Trek fans who understand some of the challenges of a person with Autism will instantly know what comparisons I’m going to make but to those who don’t understand, allow me to elaborate. In Star Trek, the character of Spock is half human and half Vulcan. Spock however develops based on his Vulcan heritage. His race suppresses all emotion in favor of logic. Logic drives their thoughts and their actions and how they approach situations. Spock is no different in this regard and his logic based approach to various challenges drive certain plot lines in the series as well as his interactions and relationships with the rest of the cast. Continue reading →

Those Days Where Your Best Doesn’t Feel Like it’s Good Enough

Posted on December 19, 2013 by flem0328

So one day I’m at an arcade playing DDR (Dance Dance Revolution) and as usual, a crowd forms around me because it isn’t everyday that they see people who could move so fast with such precision. When the song is said and done with, everyone applauds and is totally floored by my performance. Everyone is in awe and people think it’s the greatest thing they’ve seen. Everyone watching believes it was incredibly stellar, everyone except me. You see, every seems to be in awe that I managed to hit about 490/500+ steps in one song. I on the other hand am in awe that I missed those ten arrows and should have been able to hit them. While everyone is in awe about what they just saw, I’m sitting there analyzing EVERYTHING I did wrong. There is no longer “I did the best I could”, there is only “that totally sucked, I can do so much better, that was pathetic”. In those moments I realized that I ‘m perfectionist and that I seem t never take what I can get. Continue reading →

Holding Onto Anger is like Drinking Poison and Expecting the Other Person to Die

Posted on December 13, 2013 by flem0328

A wise person once said that “Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die”. What would happen if despite some of your best efforts there are times where you can’t help but continue to take sips of that poison because long after the fact you’ve been hurt, the memory can sometimes drive you mad, it stares you in your face like a nasty scar. The wound maybe closed but the memories will always remain. You continue to sip that poison because some days the memory hurts so badly that you feel as if the crime justifies the hate. Continue reading →

That Thing Where I Get Too Focused On A Task

Posted on December 10, 2013 by flem0328

Imagine that you’re watching a really good movie or maybe you’re engrossed in a really good novel. Maybe all your attention is on your significant other or maybe you’re engaged in a task the requires all of your attention like fixing something or assembling it. Maybe you’re at work and you would hope that should anyone decide to call you between the hours of 9-5 that it’s going to be something worth putting aside a task for. You’re so far into whatever zone or moment you’re in that any distraction such as a phone call or someone who completely disregards the fact that you’re completely occupied is enough for you to get extremely frustrated because either the said distraction has now taken you out of the zone of mental focus you so desperately required to complete your task efficiently or instead of progressing the said movie or book or even video game you’ve been putting so much energy into you’re now completely thrown out of what ever zone of immersion that made the experience enjoyable. Maybe it was a phone call, maybe someone came storming into whatever room you were in and become enough of a distraction to completely kill what ever moment you were in and in those moments a part of you knows damn well that if what ever someone blatantly killed your focus for isn’t urgent, important, relevant, or time sensitive enough to warrant taking you out of your zone, you’re all of a sudden a hair a away from giving them the dirtiest look you’ve ever given anyone in years and maybe even getting annoyed if this be comes too much of a common re-occurrence. Amplify this focus feeling of annoyance when the said focus is broken and you have my complex and sometimes whacked out mind. Continue reading →

That Place Where Everyone Is Just As Broken As You

Posted on December 5, 2013 by flem0328

WARNING: SOME STRONG LANGUAGE! READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED!

Ugh, it’s that time again, that time that comes every one to three months where I have to take the walk of shame but to where you ask? It’s sometimes the last place you’d like to be, especially when it because the reason you’re there in the first place involves a rather sensitive issue that I’ve covered in a few blogs. As you take that walk you try to recount where you’ve been emotionally the last few months and if you happen to encounter any “triggers” in your travels through the minefield known as life. It is in those moments this you remember that once again it’s time to see your psychiatrist.
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The Hoarders of Sometimes Useless Knowledge

Posted on December 3, 2013 by flem0328

You ever work with someone on the Autism spectrum only to find out they they seem to obsess over that one thing, that one thing that they just can’t go without talking about that is of far more importance to them than it is to you, that one thing that after hearing about for a while you’ll want to blow your brains out yet you’ll hear us talk about it long after you’ve blown your brains out?

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